The single one !

Another one bites the dust!!!

A common " figure of speech said when someone either dies or gets married"

During my 37 years of singledom, I've always had that single friend who relates! That single friend to fall back on for a good night of laughs, shits n giggles and hanging shit on so called miserable "married people!"

Today I find myself being the only 37year old single person IN THE WHOLE DAMN WORLD !!!!.

OMG, How the fuck did it get to this?????

How did getting old and single sneak up on me so fucking quickly?

Ive  always had the attitude of,  " if its meant to happen it will happen"

I still have that attitude! ... CLEARLY!

How is it  I'm the only one left  to be lonely and pathetic???

OK, I'm not really lonely and pathetic, I do love my life ... It would just be really nice to have at least  that booty call to turn to every now and then..

I never realised how important it is to come home to someone.. Yes I come home to my beloved pooches and their in sufferable need to please and love me, they listen to me but they also need me.

I think its important to establish a relationship with someone who doesn't actually need you, they just want you !
Those pooches of mine that fill my void of being in a relationship, can also make me worry the most!!!

Who will take care of them when I get really sick?

Then again .... Who will take care of me when I get really sick?

I thought about what will happen to my dogs  if I were to ever die before them???

That thought haunted me, I had anxiety and I went off into some weird world of fear and terror.

Yes, over the fucking dogs..

I'm certainly not afraid to die, I'm afraid of what I will leave behind.

If I had that special someone in my life, would my fear be resolved, or would I be more afraid ????